Welcome to your weekly digest of the Mindful Queer’s Wellness Club!

Something got me thinking last week,

Mainly about when we are in the thick of our chaos/breakups/ unexpected life changes:

Nobody talks about it.

But why not??

We share our happiest moments,
our promotions,
our anniversaries,
our best lives

But why don't we share those moments when we are alone in our thoughts, feelings, and emotions?

Vulnerability? 👎🏽
Fear? 👎🏽
Sadness? 👎🏽
Pain?👎🏽

It’s been about a month now since my breakup, and I would say (don't jinx me on this) I've made it through the thick of it.

There are still moments everyday where I feel a sense of immense sadness, that I might not get through this, or feelings that I won't be myself again.

Getting back into a workout routine, eating normally and spending some time to stretch & breathe have made significant improvements in my mood & outlook of life.

My energy feels like it's coming back,

I feel excited to have something to challenge myself,

I am loving working with client's again,

and I am learning how to spread love again.

If you didn't see, I am helping out my dad (knee problems) and my mom (low back recovery) fix their health issues, you can see the first video I made by clicking here!

I hope to put out a couple videos each week showing the progress & work we all are going to do.

Make sure to follow me on TikTok @themindfulqueer as I embark on this journey.

To build on top of last week's newsletter, how to get motivated again,

This week, we are focusing on how to stick with exercise.

If exercising were that easy, personal trainers would be out of a job!

But we all know how difficult working out can be, and not just the workout itself, but the constant will to keep pushing yourself -

squat after squat,
day after day,
month after month,
year after year...

When you start to realize that motivation will only take you so far in life, you realize that motivation isn't the same as consistency.

Consistency creates the habit of action. No matter how small or large, consistent daily action creates unbreakable routines that allow for growth and failure.

This weekend, I just onboarded a new client for Personal Coaching. During our consultation call, we went over some limiting factors that could be improved to make serious gains - adding more movement & activity to their routine on a day to day basis.

Some Context: He had just moved almost 6 months ago and getting back into a routine after a cross country move has been a struggle with work, a new city, and a new life.

Now, a traditional personal trainer would have probably told him to start working out 7x / week, bodybuilding split, eating 2000 calories, etc etc.

But for 90% of people, simply telling someone to go from 0 to 150% just isn't going to cut it.

Telling someone what to do vs having autonomy in your own decision making is the difference between mindlessly doing an activity and creating a lifelong habits.

So instead, our approach this month is trying various movements 3X / week with the intention of getting to a 5 / 10 in effort.

He can use the elliptical, go for a walk outside, work on a couple mobility exercises, or get in a couple exercises from our training session in a circuit.

The goal ISN'T to kill him the first month.

Let me repeat this, because too many people think that you have to approach fitness with the perpetual pain & suffering.

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO KILL YOURSELF GETTING BACK INTO A ROUTINE.

GOT IT!?

⚠️Too much of anything without proper guidance will lead to putting unnecessary stress on your body, and you don't want to make this harder than it already is*

Identifying baselines & trying a variety of movements is designed to help create awareness of what he's currently capable of doing and seeing what types of "fitness' he enjoys.

As he improves his strength and capability, he will builds a solid foundation that will allow him to have a great cardiovascular system & hit all major movement patterns, which will set him up for success in the coming months!

So why do it this way then the traditional way??

Let me explain a little in detail.

Work is really busy.

Or your dog threw up all over the living room.

Or your sleep schedule is all sorts of wack and trying to workout on 5 hours of sleep, just sounds awful.

Any number of obstacles, distractions, and competing demands can make it so easy (and understandable!) to put your fitness, nutrition, and health goals on hold.

Most of us have done this. We tell ourselves, “I’ll start that new habit when life calms down a bit.”

Problem is…

Things never really slow down permanently.

And so, we persistently delay improvements to “another time.”

Occasionally, life does offer a tiny, ideal window, and we try to do it all—all the food prep, all the fitness classes, all the meditating.

But it’s just a window.

When it closes, we’re stuck again, struggling to make progress.

Here’s how to keep moving.

It starts with a paradigm shift:

Don’t think of your health habits as an “on” or “off” switch; imagine they’re on a dial.

When life is sweet and smooth, you can turn your exercise, nutrition, and sleep dials way up—if you want. Bust through your PRs at the gym, eat all the arugula, meditate like a monk.

But if life is bumpy and crunched, you don’t have to switch off completely.

Just turn the dial down a little.

If you can’t do the whole workout, do some foam rolling. If you can’t make healthy, balanced meals at home, add a side salad to your takeout.

Here's how the dial method might work for exercise, but you can apply this same thinking to your nutrition, sleep, stress management, relationships, and environment.

Whatever the goal, there’s a range of improvements to make—it’s never “all or nothing.”

The truth is: The strongest people aren’t doing it all.

They’ve just learned to do something—even on the messiest, busiest, temptation-filled days.

Now let’s get moving!

Tag me in your story @mindfulqueer on instagram with ways you are sticking to your exercise routine! Use #WELLNESSCLUB in your post!

Practice of the Week

Practice #6: Think on a Continuum

Pillar:
Resilience

Skill:
Growth Mindset

Toolbox of Creativity:

-Ask yourself, How could I make my recovery capacity just a little bit better?
-Consider how to practice recovery behaviors slightly more consistently
-Consider a choice that you have to regularly make. Write out or draw your continuum of options
-Complete the All-or-None Worksheet

Why?

Rather than “all-or-nothing”, consider choices along a spectrum

When we consider choices along a spectrum, we are able to listen to how tired our body really is.

We can listen to our mind when we are mentally fatigued.

When we listen to our heart when we are emotionally drained, we can express our feelings thoughtfully & appropriately.

So we can make choices that improve our lives, not make it harder.

How to Do it Better?

Think back to the last time when you've practiced the "all or nothing" approach.

Identify what worked & what happened when things came crashing down.

How did you pick yourself back up?

Now imagine creating a new revised plan, this time by thinking on a continuum,

How would you go about planning the next 3 months?

Game Plan for the Week

Choose 1x Daily Practice to follow habitually for the week (or more)

- My Daily Practice this week is:

- How Ready are you (on a scale of 1-10):

- How Willing are you (on a scale of 1-10):

- How Able are you (on a scale of 1-10):

If you score under a 6, make the daily practice easier or less frequent till you get over an avg of 8.

If you score above a 9, and you want to push yourself, try to make that daily practice a tad bit more challenging (only if you are capable of handling that)

If you want to download a copy of my Blueprint Planner - my free 90 day goal planner that allows you to breakdown any goal into daily practices to help change behaviors and smash your goals, click here!

(If you want to try Practice #1: 5 minute Action, to easiest and quickest way to building actionable habits in your life, check it out!)

🫶🏽That wraps up the Wellness Club for this Monday!

Hope you have a fantastic week!

Thank you for being a loyal subscriber, and keep an eye out for some new and exciting events coming up just for Wellness Club subscribers!

❤️I am still working on getting back to content creating, podcasting and creating more videos on Youtube & TikTok, hopefully by next week, I will be back ready to go! Thank you for all the support.

If you have any questions or feedback, please send a DM or email over!

PS: I am working on workout plans that will be out in just a few short weeks, if you want to be a beta tester - Please fill out this form and I will get back to you later this week with a welcome email!

Good vibes,
John Kim (They/Them)
THE MINDFUL QUEER